SEND HIM INTO A CUBICLE WITH MAGAZINES?

ALL THOSE PEOPLE THAT SAY LIFE BEGINS AT 4O.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? HAVEN'T YOU PROGRAMMES
TO MAKE? NO, YOU'RE ALL ON THE BBC GRAVY TRAIN!

SORRY ABOUT THAT.
ROBERT A BIT SLOW ON THE UPTAKE THERE.

# THE CHANCES OF ANYTHING
COMING FROM MARS

ALAN, I'VE TOLD YOU A THOUSAND TIMES,
NO ONE WANTS TO KILL YOU.

IT'S SOUP YOU CAN EAT. BUT LOTS OF LIQUID.

RIGHT, SONJA. LET'S SORT THIS TIMETABLE OUT.

SHE'S TALKING ABOUT SELLING THIS STUFF
AT THE COVERED MARKET.

WE COULD CALL IT
"AROUND THE WORLD WITH ALAN PARTRIDGE

- LYNN, ARE YOU WEARING PERFUME?
- YES.

LISTEN, JUST TO CLEAR SOMETHING UP, YOU KNOW
WHEN YOU MAKE THOSE SORT OF RISQUE COMMENTS,

NO MOBILE PHONE.
BATTERIES OUT OF YOUR PAGER.

BASED ON MICHAEL PALIN'S "POLE TO POLE".

I JUST HATE THE GENERAL PUBLIC.

SHE SAYS,
"WOULD YOU DRIVE US HOME... TO CARDIFF?"

THAT'LL TAKE ME BY SURPRISE.

WHY IS IT THAT THEY PUT THE PERFUME
IN THE MONKEY'S EYES?