DO YOU KNOW, IF KING ARTHUR
HAD HAD AN EXTENDER ON HIS TABLE...

(IMPERSONATING ALAN)
MORNING, SUSAN. AH-A!

OH.

- CAN'T YOU CUT A LESS IMPORTANT FILM?
- WHOA! WHOA!

- THAT'S SACKING PEOPLE.
- WELL, BASICALLY, YEAH.

- RUBBISH!
- I'M ON AN ARCHERY WEEKEND WITH HIM.

IT'S ALAN PARTRIDGE.

- THIS IS THE KITCHEN, OBVIOUSLY.
- LOVELY.

SEE YOU NEXT WEEK, THEN.

ONE FOR HIM AND ONE FOR HIS BROTHER-IN-LAW.

GOOD. GOOD.

- I CAN DO YOU A CUP OF BEANS.
- A CUP OF BEANS?

WHERE'S EVERYBODY ELSE?

GOING TO HAVE TO INTERRUPT YOU, STEPHEN,
IT'S TIME NOW FOR ALAN'S "FACT OF THE DAY".

OH, I SEE WHAT YOU... RIGHT, YES.

JUST JOSHING. HAVE YOU PUT T'CORPSE UNDER T'PATIO?

NO. IT WAS JUST A MR P NISHEAD.

- BOLLOCKS! YOU DON'T KNOW BONO.
- I DO KNOW BONO.