A CERTAIN PERCENTAGE OF THEIR PROGRAMMES

- I SPEAK NO OTHER LANGUAGE. DRINK?
- YEAH. BIG SHOT OF DIRECTOR'S BITTER.

ALAN?

ALAN PARTRIDGE TIE AND BLAZER BADGE
AND WAGON WHEELS. EXCELLENT.

- CAN I COME WITH YOU?
- NO.

I SAY POT-AY-TO, YOU SAY...POTATO.

DAN! DAN!

MORE FROM CAMP DAVID TOMORROW.
THE TIME IS...

BIT MORE...A BIT MORE...

(HE LAUGHS)

(HEAVY ACCENT) IF THEY HAD PROPER JOBS,
THEY WOULDN'T BE UP TO ALL THIS LARKING.

THE STAFF ARE POLITE, BUT THEIR SMILES ARE...

I NEVER THOUGHT, WHEN I WAS IN MY 20S,
I'D HAVE TO PUSH.

THIS WEEK'S GUEST PETROL IS TEXACO.

- THERE YOU GO, TWO CHOCOLATE MOUSSES.
- THANK YOU.

- THANKS FOR THE SOUVENIR.
- NO PROBLEM.

YOU ARE A BIG POSH SOD
WITH PLUMS IN YOUR MOUTH.

SORRY ABOUT THAT.