ALAN?

IT'S THE BANK HOLIDAY WEEKEND.
A TERRIBLE TIME FOR THE LONELY.

- YOU'RE SEXY, BUT I DON'T TRUST YOU.
- JAMES BOND DOESN'T LIVE IN A CARAVAN.

SORT OF LEAN ON THE WALL.

LIKE TO STICK TO YOUR OWN?

SOD 'EM!

MY LANDLADY IS TELLING ME THAT THE GIRL MUST GO

AND THE OTHER HALF OVER THERE.

NO, IT WAS THE OPPOSITE. EVOLUTION, NOT REVOLUTION.

A GOOD SLOGAN FOR THE TOURIST BOARD.

BUT IT WAS DIFFERENT FOR ME, LIKE
'CAUSE I WAS IN THE ARMY WHEN I WAS SEVENTEEN.

(WOMAN CHEER)

- HOW'S THAT?
- YEAH, THAT'LL DO.

THEIR WORTH IS WORTH...

YOU TELL TAX PEOPLE THEY WON'T FIND YOUR MONEY?

- YOU HAVEN'T GOT A SPOON?
- THERE'S ONE IN THE BATHROOM.

OR INDEED, KILLING THEM WITH SYPHILIS.
HERE'S MONSIEUR DAVID CLIFTON.

WHICH, IRONICALLY, IS LIKE A LARGE PETROL STATION.