(PHONE)

- GIVE HIM ANOTHER SERIES, YOU SWINE!
- YEAH, GIVE ME ANOTHER SERIES, YOU SHIT.

I DON'T WANT TO EAT AN INTESTINE
OR A CHICKEN HEART ON A MINI MUFFIN.

- YEAH.
- YUP, THOUGHT SO.

THAT'S JUST WRONG.
YOU SHOULDN'T DO IT THE OTHER WAY ROUND.

IT'S ALAN PARTRIDGE.

LOVELY TO SEE YOU, LYNN.

DO YOU SMELL GAS?

"COME BACK ON, ELO, AND CARRY ON PLAYING!"

THAT'S NOT REALLY MY KIND OF HUMOUR.

- WHO INVENTED THE SKIP?
- I DON'T CARE, I THINK IT'S WAY OUT OF ORDER..

- THAT'S RIDICULOUS.
- I KNOW.

ANY MORE NEWS, ALAN?

THEN ATE THE EVIDENCE.

YOU HAVE TO PHONE THE COUNCIL, BUT THEY'VE
SHOVED YOUR MOBILE PHONE UP YOUR BACKSIDE.

- DO YOU MIND IF I HAVE A GO?
- SURE. HELP YOURSELF.

YOU IGNORANT SHIT!

- MORNING, EVERYONE. MORNING, JILL.
- THANKS FOR THE CHOCOLATE ORANGE, ALAN.