..MOST TIMES. THANKS.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT HE HAD FOR BREAKFAST
PRESUMABLY AN INFECTED SPINAL COLUMN IN A BAP.

WHY IS IT THAT THEY PUT THE PERFUME
IN THE MONKEY'S EYES?

I IMAGINE THAT'S A MONTH'S WAGES
TO SOMEONE LIKE YOU. HELLO?

AND DRIVEN TO A BIG WAREHOUSE
TO BE, LITERALLY, PULPED.

- NONE TAKEN.
- YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO SAY.

BREATH OF FRESH AIR?!

I BET A LOT OF THESE GO MISSING
AND END UP AS WORK SURFACES IN LUXURY KITCHENS.

- THE CHICKEN IS EMPTY.
- IT'S HOLLOW?

ANYWAY, HE THANKS HER
FOR THAT STOLEN AFTERNOON

WELCOME TO TAPE TWO
OF "LET GO WITH ALAN PARTRIDGE",

LIKE A BOW-TIE, BUT MINIATURE?
LIKE AN ACTION MAN BOW-TIE.

AH, HELLO, SUSAN. THERE'S A SLIGHT PROBLEM.

IT'S ALAN PARTRIDGE. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!

I'LL HAVE TO MAKE TWO TRIPS. I KEEP DROPPING BITS.

IT'S NOT HARDCORE SUPER SEX.

- WELL, I WOULDN'T BE DEPRESSED.
- I'M NOT.

- HE LIKES AMERICAN THINGS.
- LIKE DR PEPPER?