I TELL YOU, YOU'VE NOT WITNESSED PURE EVIL

YOU SIT THERE ON YOUR FAT BEHIND,

NO, ACTUALLY. IT WAS LIKE THIS.

- CAN'T YOU CUT A LESS IMPORTANT FILM?
- WHOA! WHOA!

- WOULD YOU LIKE THIS BOOK?
- NOT NOW, MICHAEL...

YOU MAKE PIGS SMOKE.

YOU FILL IN THE POND WITH CONCRETE,
PLOUGH THE FAMILY INTO THE FIELD,

IT'S SIMPLY... A COCKEREL, I MEAN.
IT'S SIMPLY A WAY OF SAYING IT'S VALENTINE'S DAY.

I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU SWEAT OVER YOUR WORK.

IRONIC, REALLY. HE WORKED
IN TELEVISION HIS WHOLE LIFE

(ALAN) LET BATTLE COMMENCE.

I'M BEING LIGHT-HEARTED.
SHOOT YOUR CHUFF THROUGH THAT DOOR.

HE COMES OUT, "NOT MY TRIUMPH STAG!
I'VE JUST HAD IT RESPRAYED!"

UM... I'LL SHOW YOU.

- HOW MANY BEDROOMS HAS IT GOT?
- FIVE.

- WHAT'S HIS NAME?
- GORDON.

OR BITCH, MIGHT BE A LADY.

(MUSIC)