THAT EVERYTHING I'VE SAID
THUS FAR IS COMPLETELY CORRECT?

GOING TO HAVE TO INTERRUPT YOU, STEPHEN,
IT'S TIME NOW FOR ALAN'S "FACT OF THE DAY".

AND THE BIGGEST BOWL OF ALPEN YOU'VE EVER SEEN.

I DON'T THINK WINE'S AN ELITIST THING ANY MORE.
YOU CAN GET GOOD WINE IN TESCO'S NOW.

- IF YOU OPEN YOURSELF UP TO NEW CHOICES...
- LYNN, I'M NOT COMING TO YOUR BAPTIST CHURCH!

I'VE OFTEN WONDERED, RIGHT,

I'D LIKE TO FLY A HELICOPTER AROUND NORFOLK.

YES.

MODERN FLASKS TODAY ARE DIRECTLY LINKED

RUINED A ROMANTIC NIGHT OUT
FOR MANY DINERS BY MASSACRING THEM.

"I'VE GOT TO SORT OUT ALAN'S PROBLEMS!"

THAT'LL PROBABLY BE A LOT OF TROUBLE, WON'T IT?

JUST DESTROYING MY CEREALS.

I'LL GIVE YOU 200.
THAT'S A PONY AND A BAG OF HOOVES.

AND FROM 1993 MANUFACTURERS HAVE BEEN LEGALLY
OBLIGED TO LABEL THEM "CRAB-FLAVOURED" STICKS.

IRONIC, REALLY. HE WORKED
IN TELEVISION HIS WHOLE LIFE

I HATE ARCHERS, "THE ARCHERS" AND JEFFREY ARCHER.
YOU'RE ALL DECEITFUL COWARDS.

I KNOW YOU'VE HAD PROBLEMS IN THE PAST...