ONE DAY, I CAME BACK TO MY TENT
AND IT HAD EATEN ALL MY FAGS.

I WANT A SIX-MONTH CONTRACT AT THE BBC
TO MAKE TELEVISION PROGRAMMES.

MAKE SURE I DON'T SINK THE BOAT
AND DROWN EVERYONE LIKE A BIG TWIT.

IT WAS AT THE HEIGHT OF HIS "BLUE PETER" FAME!

APROPOS ACHIEVING SURROUND SOUND.

KISS MY FACE!

WE COULD CALL IT
"AROUND THE WORLD WITH ALAN PARTRIDGE

OF COURSE, TAPE MEASURES
IN THOSE DAYS WERE VIEWED WITH SUSPICION.

- ALAN PARTRIDGE.
- DAN MOODY.

I'M NOT DRIVING A MINI METRO, I'M NOT DRIVING
A MINI METRO, I'M NOT DRIVING A MINI METRO.

- DO YOU WANT A CUP?
- THANK YOU.

HERE WE ARE. MAKE YOURSELVES COMFORTABLE
AND I'LL GIVE YOU A SHOUT WHEN WE'RE READY.

AAH. DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
I'LL POP THAT WITH THE OTHERS.

- ALAN, YOU'RE MAKING A FOOL OF YOURSELF.
- WHO-OO...

THEY'RE GOOD FOR MAKING A POINT.
ERROR ONE, RIGHT..

I'VE JUST CRACKED OPEN A BOTTLE OF SUNNY DELIGHT.

- WELL...
- TELL ME WHAT YOU MEAN BY "WATERSPORTS".

HAVE YOU ALL GOT YOUR FUN PACKS?
I'VE GOT ONE HERE.