ON THE LINE, WE HAVE, IF I'M NOT MISTAKEN
ROY FROM CAISTER ST EDMUND. HELLO.

DONALD FROM HEMSBY HAS E-MAILED US TO SAY,

- I'M FROM MANCHESTER.
- M62.

(WOMAN) HELLO, CAN I HELP YOU?

ROLLED ON THE THIGHS OF A VIRGIN.

ANOTHER WAY OF LOOKING AT IT IS
PEOPLE LIKE THEM, LET'S MAKE SOME MORE OF THEM.

THAT WAS OAP - OLD ALAN PARTRIDGE.

THERE'S ONE WORD FOR PEOPLE LIKE YOU...

- I'VE GOT YOU ALL A PRESENT.
- TA, AL.

OOH!

IT WAS A JOKE, RIGHT? IT'S BACKFIRED.

- YOU'RE AWAY WITH THE HELICOPTERS.
- LIKE "MASH". THAT BEGINS WITH AN "M".

LET'S SEE WHAT THIS IDIOT DID.. IN AMERICA.

AND THEY'LL PROBABLY LOOK BLANKLY AT YOU... HELLO?

ARE YOU HAIRY, MARY?

HE HAS A NEW BABY BOY, JOSHUA,
AND HIS DAUGHTER HAS JUST STARTED SCHOOL.

EUROPE, CONSPIRACY THEORIES, WHAT HAPPENS
IF YOU JUST EAT CRISPS. THINGS LIKE THAT.

WHICH CHRISTIAN TESTIFIES TO ON HIS SECOND TRACK.
"LONELY