GOOD MORNING TO YOU, SIR.

OH, ANYTHING REALLY, YOU KNOW.
FRANK SINATRA. KURT COBAIN.

I'LL JUST GO ON UP TO THE CLUB
AND MEET THAT VIDEO WOMAN.

GRAB A PEW.

IF I WAS DRESSED ON THE OTHER SIDE
IT WOULD BE IN CONTACT.

NOT LIKE THOSE MASSIVE STEPHEN KING BOOKS.
THEY SHOULD BE ON WHEELS.

- OH, THERE YOU ARE.
- HOW ARE YOU, MR PARTRIDGE?

- GET BACK IN THE LIFT, LYNN!
- RELOAD! I'M UP.

- WAS THAT A SNUB-NOSED UZI?
- YES, I THINK IT WAS.

THANK YOU, ALAN.

WE COULD SEE IT AT SKEGNESS.
TIMMY MALLET'S GONNA BE THERE.

BASICALLY, TERRESTRIAL TV IS A DEAD DUCK,
AND WHO WATCHES A DEAD DUCK?

- YEAH. BYE, ALAN.
- ALSO, ARCHERS.

# HE PAINTED SALFORD'S SMOKY TOPS
ON CARDBOARD BOXES FROM THE SHOPS

ALAN'S FUNNY STORIES!

YOU'RE QUITE SUCCESSFUL.
YOU GOT A SECOND SERIES.

LOOK, ALAN. NO CLOWNS, NO GAGS.

OOH, THAT WAS TERENCE TRENT D'ARBY,
COCKY MAN FROM THE '80S,