GOOD EVENING, ALAN. I'M NOT SO SURE ABOUT THAT.

- THE GUY WHO WORKS AT THE GARAGE?
- I KNOW WHERE HE WORKS.

"THEY STARTED BADLY, THEY GOT WORSE.
OOH, YOUR PROGRAMMES, YOUR PROGRAMMES."

IT'S TIME FOR US TO HAND OVER TO ALAN PARTRIDGE,
ARE YOU READY, ALAN?

"SWALLOW" IS A DETECTIVE WHO TACKLES VANDALISM.

# THE SPY WHO LOVED ME
IS KEEPING ALL MY SECRETS SAFE TONIGHT... #

NO. HE LIKES TO LIE THERE, THOUGH,
WITH THE "SUNDAY EXPRESS"

I HAD CRACKLING ON SUNDAY.
IT HAD HAIRS ON IT, BUT I DIDN'T MIND.

# WHEN I NEEDED YOU?

- AND DO YOU DO THAT WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND?
- NO, I DO IT ALONE.

LIKE TO STICK TO YOUR OWN?

MARY POPPINS! WHAT'S THAT?

HE DRINKS THAT YELLOW STUFF IN TINS. HE'S AN IDIOT!

PERHAPS IT DOESN'T FIT IN WITH HER BLINKERED
VIEW OF THE WORLD. NEVERTHELESS, NICE SONG.

TERRIBLE NEWS, TERRIBLE NEWS.

- NO.
- JUST A JOKE.

YOU COULD SAY, "I'M TERRIBLY SORRY.
WE'VE RUN OUT OF LIFE JACKETS".

SORRY. GOT TO GO.