YES, INDEED. MY NAME'S DAVE CLIFTON,
AND THERE GOES ALAN PARTRIDGE -

SOPHIE, DID YOU GET YOUR CHOCOLATE ORANGE? I GOT
YOU DARK CHOCOLATE BECAUSE YOU DON'T LIKE MILK.

(HORNS HONK)
GET OUT OF THE WAY YOU (BLEEP) IDIOT!

COME ON, LYNN.
THESE PEOPLE ARE STARTING TO ANNOY ME.

- LYNN! I'LL JUST SPEAK OVER YOU.
- BUT...

CARR. BILL CARR.

WHEN WILL THEY LEARN?
MIND, SHE WAS SEXY. SHE WORE A G-STRAP.

IT LEAVES IN FIVE MINUTES
SO BETTER LEARN TO JOG AGAIN QUICKLY.

- SHELL, ABOUT A QUARTER OF A MILE.
- HAS IT GOT A MINI-MART?

STOP TALKING ABOUT AMERICAN THINGS
AND LET'S WATCH THE BEST FILM EVER MADE.

I'LL HAVE TO RESORT TO PLAN B.

WANT A MARS BAR? SWIVEL.

WHERE ARE YOU FROM IN IRELAND?

- WE CAN STOP AT THE PETROL STATION.
- HOW IS YOUR GEORDIE MATE?

HMM! A NICE BIG THICK SLICE OF THIN LIZZY.

- DO YOU LIKE MILK?
- NO.

AND THIS VIDEO WILL FEATURE HELICOPTERS
PURSUING THESE BAD PRATS ACROSS FIELDS,

DON'T FORGET TO RINSE THE BATH.
USE THE SHOWER NOZZLE TO BLAST OFF THE SCUM.