OH, WELL, TERRIBLE REALLY.

I'VE GOT TO POP UP TO CHORISTERS
AND GET THE PA.

THERE GOES ALAN PARTRIDGE,
LICENSED TO KILL...TIME BY WATCHING VIDEOS.

- NO. YOU PULL YOUR FOOT OFF.
- MINE'S NOT ON THE SPIKE!

I REMEMBER HE CAME HOME FROM WORK
ONE NIGHT VERY EXCITED, AND HE...

I SUPPOSE IF I WAS A BURGLAR
AND I WANTED TO AVOID DETECTION

THEN I'D TYPE INTO THE ATTACK COMPUTER,
"MR CRAGG, CHEMISTRY TEACHER."

PITY, BECAUSE THEY WERE VERY KEEN ON THAT ONE.

YOU SAID YOU MIGHT GIVE ME A SECOND SERIES.
WHY IS THERE ANY DOUBT?

- UM... IN FACT, I THINK I'LL GO.
- NO.

WE'RE STOPPING THIS AFTER TONIGHT.

WELL...I'LL STOP, THEN.

IN THERE, IT'S VERY SCARY. SECONDS COUNT.

- YOUR ROOM?
- MY ROOM. IN MY HOUSE.

- IF I CAN TURN TO YOU, KATE.
- SURE.

TWELVE INCHES... KEEP IT IN MY ROOM.

IT'S JUST, YOU KNOW, MEN WHO WANT
SOMEONE TO TALK TO. THEY'RE JUST LONELY.

I DON'T RECALL SAYING THAT.