NO, THAT'S NOT WORKING.

I IMAGINE THAT'S A MONTH'S WAGES
TO SOMEONE LIKE YOU. HELLO?

- SHE'S OLDER THAN ME. SHE'S 52.
- MY GIRLFRIEND'S 33.

BECAUSE OF ALL THE CHEMICALS
YOU PUT IN THEIR CHIPS.

YES. I MEAN, YES, I WANT YOU
TO SHOW ME THE BUTTON THAT SAYS "NO".

YOU WORK IN A PETROL STATION. IT'S NOT THE GUIF WAR.

WHEN GOD WAS HANDING OUT CHESTS...

AND LET IT SLOSH ROUND MY SYSTEM,
DISPENSING THE COFFEE.

- A PIECE OF FRUIT?
- NO, THANKS.

MAKE SURE I DON'T SINK THE BOAT
AND DROWN EVERYONE LIKE A BIG TWIT.

LIKE A HUMAN JCB.

SORRY. I SHOULDN'T TOUCH MEMBERS OF STAFF

BUT WHAT IF HE HADN'T BEEN PLASTIC?

WHY?

- HOW'S THAT?
- YEAH, THAT'LL DO.

I USED TO THINK, "OOH, SHE'S NICER THAN MY WIFE!"

THEN HE SPIES THAT COOKBOOK
AND SAYS, "IT'D BE NAE USE TO ME"!

- DO "BLUE PETER" WANT TO FILM HERE?
- NO.