I SAY, "THIS IS FOR YOU, TOM!"
HE'S BEGGING US, MAN. "NO! PLEASE! DON'T!"

- YOU CAN SIT ON ALAN'S FACE. IT'S A JOKE.
- IT'S A FILTHY JOKE! ALAN IS HITTING YOU.

QUITE ATTRACTIVE. PUT THAT DOWN AS A PLUS POINT.

- BUT I'M NOT A SEX OFFENDER.
- WE'VE GOT THAT IN COMMON.

- WHAT YOU WANT TO DO IS...
- I LOVE THIS.

AND THIS BEAUTIFUL LASSIE COMES UP,
AND SHE'S HALF THE PRICE OF THE OTHERS,

- NICE TO MEET YOU, COLIN.
- COLIN?

- IT'S A BIT MORE TASTEFUL THAN THAT.
- IT'S CALLED "TITSNADE ZOO".

LET MYSELF IN. NEEDED THE TOILET.

L HOPE YOU DON'T MIND,

YEAH. I HATE MERCS.
PEOPLE WHO DRIVE THEM ARE JUST SA-A-AD.

I GOT REALLY DRUNK LAST NIGHT.
I WAS SICK EVERYWHERE.

CERTAINLY NOT "BRAVO TWO ZERO" BY ANDY MCNAB,
WHICH ACTUALLY IMPROVES WITH EVERY READ.

I USED TO CHAT TO ANOTHER BLOKE
BUT HE LIKES AMERICAN THINGS.

- WHAT'S THE ONE WITH THE LASER BEAM?
- "GOLDFINGER"!

PRAY SILENCE, PLEASE,
FOR THE ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA.

YEAH. CHICKEN STOCK!

# TELL YOU WHAT. TELL YOU WHAT
IT'S NINE AND A HALF THOUSAND POUNDS #