THEY START OFF THE SIZE OF MINI FRISBEES,
AND THEY END UP LIKE ACTUAL-SIZE PARACETAMOL.

RIGHT...MINIBAR.

(ALAN) GO, GO, GO, GO. START THE CAR.

THAT'S THE SMALL TALK OVER WITH.
LET'S GO ON TO THE THORNY ISSUE OF THE FEE.

- THESE PEOPLE ARE FRIENDS OF BONO?
- STILL ON THAT?

I'VE GOT A BROAD TASTE,

I WALKED OUT AFTER FIVE MINUTES.
IT WAS DEMEANING.

SO A BETTER TITLE WOULD BE "SCUM ON THE RUN".

LYNN, ARE THOSE YOUR MOTHER'S CATARACT GLASSES?

AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR ALAN'S "FACT OF THE DAY".

I GOT THEM FROM A CYCLING TEST CENTRE.

FROM THE BRIT-POP BANDS
LIKE UB4O, DEF LEPPARD,

THEY'RE PULPING THE UNSOLD 14,OOO COPIES
OF MY BOOK NEXT THURSDAY

- DO YOU LIKE MINI KIEV'S?
- I LOVE THEM, BUT MY WIFE'S VEGETARIAN.

THERE'S A LOVELY PHRASE WHERE IT SAYS,
"BOATING APPEALS TO BOTH FRIENDS AND FAMILY ALIKE".

I WONDERED IF YOU HAD ANY MORE
ALAN PARTRIDGE TIE AND BADGE PACKS?

THAT IS SUPERB.
OH, THERE YOU GO, IT'S ALL HAPPENING.