# THE SPIDER'S TOUCH

COULD YOU GIVE THIS TO ALAN.
IT'S FUNGAL FOOT POWDER.

THAT'S RUBBISH. I KNOW FOR A FACT
MARTIN LEWIS GOT TWO POWER SHOWERS OUT OF THEM.

LEVEL WITH ME, PIET. HAVE I GOT THIS JOB?

THE NAME FOR THAT IS ACTUALLY A GILET.

WHAT HAVE YOU GOT FOR ME, LYNN?

I SEE. THE IDEA IS THAT U2 ARE GOING INTO SPACE?

- JUST SAY YES!
- YES!

- I'M FROM DUBLIN. NOT IN DUBLIN.
- BUT THAT'S WHERE YOU MAKE THEM.

SUCK MY SUCH AND SUCH.

- DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?
- YEAH.

(WOMAN) "I ENJOYED "THE HOBBIT"
MORE THAN "RIVERDANCE"

BUT CAN YOU DO THIS?
(MAKES CLICKING NOISE)

- AND I'LL SHOW YOU THAT MIRROR THING.
- NO.

I THINK THAT WENT QUITE WELL.

(APPLAUSE)

THAT FARMERS ENCOUNTER FROM ARMCHAIR PUNDITS
WHO FORGET TO THINK BEFORE THEY OPEN THEIR MOUTH.

- I'VE ALREADY POURED HALF.
- IT'S ALL RIGHT.