BUT HE MUST ALSO SACK HER FROM HER JOB AS HIS
RECEPTIONIST. I DIDN'T MENTION THAT EARLIER,

I DON'T WANT SALVATION.
I JUST WANT TO BE ABLE TO SAY...

THEY MIGHT EAT THEM IN YOUR COUNTY.
WE DON'T HERE.

- THAT'S CUSTOMS AND EXCISE.
- RIGHT.

THAT WAS GREAT. I DIDN'T KNOW YOU COULD SING.

JUST HAVING SOME HYGIENIC SNOGGING.

SERIOUSLY THOUGH, DO GIVE ME A CALL.

I'M JUST A FAN, ALAN, THAT'S ALL.
YOUR BIGGEST FAN.

AND WATCH "CHITTY CHITTY BANG BANG"
WITH STING.

THE WAY SHE LOOKED AT THAT NURSE.
GOD REST HER RACIST SOUL.

- OH, ALAN. CONE YOU TAKE A JOKE?
- OH, FUCK OFF!

DO YOU WANT A MINT?

ONE DAY I ARRANGED THEM ALL ON THE FLOOR

- DID YOU SEE MR BROWN AND HIS FRIENDS OFF?
- YES. I SHOULD GET A BRAVERY AWARD FOR IT!

ENYA...AND THE OTHER ONE.
RIPPED UP THE POPE. BALD CHAP.

I WANT A SIX-MONTH CONTRACT AT THE BBC
TO MAKE TELEVISION PROGRAMMES.

IT'S A VIDEO
BY THE WEST COUNTY COMEDIAN JETHRO.

- I CAN HEAR 'EM. I CAN'T SEE 'EM.
- THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT ON...