SHALL I BOOK YOU FOR CHRISTMAS DINNER?

VERY MALTY.

I'VE GOT A CLEAN LICENCE.

HI, I'M ALAN PARTRIDGE AND I DRIVE A CAR,
BUT NOT LIKE THIS.

- CAN I INTRODUCE MY PA LYNN?
- HELLO.

BONO? HE'S NOT HERE. DO YOU FANCY A CURRY?

BUT I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU HERE AGAIN. ALL RIGHT?

KILL! KILL! STAB! TWIST! KILL!

LOOK, SONJA.

(SUSAN) TEA? COFFEE?

- "A PARTRIDGE AMONGST THE PIGEONS."
- WHAT'S THAT?

HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT DAMON HILL...
OW! LYNN! BE CAREFUL WITH IT.

- YOO-HOO!
- HELLO, LYNN. WOULD YOU LIKE A COFFEE?

- WE'VE GOT SOMETHING FOR YOU.
- OH, YEAH?

THAT'S A HOMOSEXUAL.

CARD WITH A HANDSHAKE?
I USED TO DO THAT, BUT KEPT GETTING IT WRONG.

YOU'RE THE BIGGEST.
YOU'D BETTER HAVE THE MUG.

DON'T WORRY.
IT'S JUST A CUSHION THAT SIMULATES RECTAL GAS.