THEN YOU'LL KISS ME.

OH, YEAH. DOCUMENTARIES.
FEMINIST WITH THE FLAT CHEST.

THANK YOU, PETER BAXENDALE THOMAS.

- OR ALL THREE!
- THAT'S UNHYGIENIC.

- IT'S JUST ME AND DAN GOING.
- FINE. I'LL JUST GET HAMMERED ON ME OWN.

TO PUT THAT IN PERSPECTIVE,
IT'S 11 TIMES THE POPULATION OF HEMSBY.

- A PIECE OF FRUIT?
- NO, THANKS.

NO, SHE SOUNDS WEIRD. YOU CAN'T USE THAT.

NOT CHRIST. SORRY, I KEEP SAYING CHRIST.

WHAT DO YOU RECKON?
"3 P.M. AN AFTERNOON WITH ALAN PARTRIDGE,"

- WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?
- SORRY.

I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW.

"TAKE THAT BLUSHER OFF
YOU UGLY MISSHAPEN-HEADED ELEPHANT TRANNY"?

# NOW HE TAKES HIS BRUSH AND HE WAITS
OUTSIDE THEM FACTORY GATES

SO, ER...

WHY DON'T YOU ISSUE A FULL RETRACTION, AND YOU'LL
GET YOURSELF OUT OF A LOT OF SILLY BOTHER?

WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

AND HE WAS ONLY THREE.