I THINK PEOPLE ARE SAYING,

CARD WITH A HANDSHAKE?
I USED TO DO THAT, BUT KEPT GETTING IT WRONG.

THAT'S JUST WEIRD.

- IS IT?
- YEAH.

MY POINT IS THAT I'VE BEEN LOOKING
FOR THE POSITIVES IN YOUR BOOK,

YOU KNOW, ONE TO CANCEL OUT THE NEGATIVE

WHOA! BACK OFF, SECONDS OUT
ROUND ONE, DING-DING!

"FROM ALAN PARTRIDGE."

- HE'S ALWAYS BEEN AT THIS LEVEL.
- AYE. WHEN I WAS IN THE ARMY...

- A TABLE FOR TWO, SIR?
- YES, PLEASE.

- ANY MESSAGES?
- JUST THE ONE. FROM BILL ODDIE.

CALM DOWN, LYNN!
YOU'RE SUFFERING FROM MINOR WOMEN'S WHIPLASH.

I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE INTO MUSIC.
I'VE HEARD YOUR SHOW.

ALAN, THE BUILDERS ARE WAITING TO SIGN OFF.

- DO YOU WANT SOME CHEESE?
- NO, THANK YOU.

I'M JUST PREPARING A JOKE FOR THEM,
WHICH SHOULD BE FUN.

- PARTY BAG.
- OH, THANK YOU. BYE BYE.

THOUGH THE EFFECTS OF 23 YEARS ON THE GAME