THEY LIVE IN THE TOWER OF LONDON
AND THEY ARE RESTAURANTS.

NOT A TRACE. PEACE OF MIND, I'M SURE
ESPECIALLY IF YOU HAVE ELDERLY RELATIVES ON BOARD.

- CAROLINE, LINE FOUR. HELLO.
- HAVE YOU GOT A BRAIN, OR ARE YOU FULL OF SHIT?

IF YOU STICK AROUND
FOR THE AFTERNOON WITH ALAN PARTRIDGE,

- DO YOU WANT ONE?
- YEAH.

SORRY IT'S A BUILDING SITE.
YOU SHOULD HAVE A HAT HARD ON.

- DO YOU WANT SOMETHING TO EAT?
- NO, THANKS.

WHICH IS CLIMAXING AT MIDNIGHT WITH MADNESS.

- DID YOU WATCH MY TV SHOW?
- OH, YES.

- PAINTED ON.
- YEAH. EXACTLY.

IT'S VERY FAKE, ISN'T IT?

I THINK SEAN WOULD RATHER WANDER ROUND
THE WILDFOWL PARK IN PEPPERSTOCK

YOU CAN DROWN IN A CUP OF COFFEE.
OR IS IT AN INCH OF WATER? AAAGH!

I DON'T KNOW WHETHER THIS PROTRUSION
IS A GOOD OR BAD THING.

UNBELIEVABLE.

GIRLFRIEND'S LEFT ME.

- SHALL I PUT IT IN THE MIDDLE?
- THAT WOULD BE HELPFUL.

- HOW LONG HAVE WE BEEN DRINKING?
- THREE-QUARTERS OF AN HOUR.