- OH! TALK OF THE DEVIL!
- MORNING, MR PARTRIDGE.

- WHAT DO YOU THINK OF AMERICAN THINGS?
- A BIT FULL OF THEMSELVES.

- I HOPE YOU'RE BEING LOOKED AFTER.
- BOB OWNS A GARDEN CENTRE.

AND HE SAID
"THAT'S SA-A-AD! YOU OUGHT TO UPGRADE,"

(BURPS)

- HELLO, ALAN.
- OH! HELLO...ER...

I HAVE A MILITARY-BASED QUIZ SHOW ON CABLE TV
CALLED "SKIRMISH", AND A GIRLFRIEND.

IT'S JUST AN ARMY SAYING. GIVE US ANOTHER ONE.

AND IT WAS FULL OF SOILED BANDAGES.

ALAN'S LOVE ASYLUM

LIKE A BOW-TIE, BUT MINIATURE?
LIKE AN ACTION MAN BOW-TIE.

WITH SOME LIPSTICK ON AND A NICE DRESS,
AND SAID, "HOW DO I LOOK?"

THEY'D LIKE YOU TO JUDGE
THE VEGETABLE COMPETITION.

- EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT?
- JUST A BIT OF TUMMY TROUBLE.

YES. THAT'S FOR HYGIENE REASONS.
IT LETS THE BUTTOCKS BREATHE.

- IT'S RALPH LAUREN.
- CAN I HAVE A SNIFF?

# HE'S THE MAN

- WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING AT?
- I'M LAUGHING AT THE BURNING ISSUE JOKE.