YES. SURE.

ALAN, THERE'S THAT TEACHER CHAP.

DID HE EVER TURN ALL THE LIGHTS OFF IN THE HOUSE
AND RUN TOWARDS YOU WITH A TORCH

# OH, RATTLING ROARING WILLY IS HE
HE'S OFF TO THE BBC

YOU'VE MADE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE
ON THE BANQUETTE. GREAT.

GIVE HIM A TWIRL. LET THE DOG SEE THE RABBIT.

PARTRIDGE. YES, I'LL HOLD.

RESEARCH.

- HAVE YOU MET JANE?
- YEAH. I'VE DONE HER.

OH, AYE. I'VE SEEN SOME TERRIBLE THINGS, MIND.

UNLESS I'M REPRIMANDING THEM,

WHICH BRINGS US ON VERY NEATLY
TO MY NEXT GUEST,

PUT THEM IN NAPPIES AND GET THEM TO THROW
EACH OTHER OUT OF A CIRCLE DRAWN WITH CHALK.

- HI. I'M ALAN PARTRIDGE.
- PIET.

- YOU WERE ON THE TOILET.
- WAS I ON THAT LONG?

L MEAN, AT FIRST I WAS MORTIFIED..

DON'T YOU FEEL GOOD? RELAX.

HELLO.