I DON'T HAVE DONKEYS,
AND IF I DID I WOULDN'T FEED THEM CHIPS.

NO, SHE SOUNDS WEIRD. YOU CAN'T USE THAT.

YOU SIT THERE ON YOUR FAT BEHIND,

WHERE WE CAN BUY ANYTHING FROM PLIMSOLLS
TO POSTERS OF FAMOUS HOLLYWOOD STARS,

- WHAT'S THIS LITTLE SINK, HERE?
- THAT'S A RINSER.

ARE A MILLION MILES FROM YOUR THOUGHTS
AS YOU NEGOTIATE THE NORFOLK BROADS.

I'M DOWN TO DO A SPOT NOW.
I'LL BE TALKING ABOUT GOD. SO IF YOU HANG AROUND...

THE VEY FACT THAT
HARD-CORE PORNOGRAPHY IS NOT ON THE AGENDA...

NO, IT ACTUALLY SAYS "COCK, PISS, PARTRIDGE".

IN 1976, I SAW ELO AT THE BIRMINGHAM NEC.

..PREMEDITATED HOMICIDE OF A MOUSE,

- I WALKED OFF.
- WHO'S UPSET YOU THIS TIME?

- HE'S ALWAYS BEEN AT THIS LEVEL.
- AYE. WHEN I WAS IN THE ARMY...

THE BEST THING IS PEOPLE COMING UP TO ME...

- GET YOUR GIRLFRIEND TO DO IT.
- YEAH!

CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS IN THE MORNING?

WELL, THAT'S THE SMALL TALK.
NOW LET'S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS.

NEXT WEEK'S GUEST PETROL WILL BE... TEXACO AGAIN.