AND I'LL BE ALAN PARTRIDGE!

YOU'VE DONE SOME CRAZY THINGS IN YOUR LIFE.

THEY COULD AFFORD TO EAT IN A MODEST RESTAURANT.

CHIPS AND CRINKLE-CUT CHIPS.

ALAN, MORE GOOD NEWS...

THE BOYS ARE BACK IN THE BARRACKS.

PARDON? NO. I'VE GOT A BETTER IDEA.
SHOVE IT UP YOUR ARSE!

I'D LOVE TO FEEL AN AIRBAG GO OFF IN MY FACE.

- WHEN I'VE SEEN YOU DEPRESSED...
- NOT ME!

THEY LIVE IN THE TOWER OF LONDON
AND THEY ARE RESTAURANTS.

THAT'S FINE, FILL HER UP.

WITH SOME LIPSTICK ON AND A NICE DRESS,
AND SAID, "HOW DO I LOOK?"

YES. WE'LL GO STRAIGHT TO APACHE...
AFTER A PUB LUNCH FOR AN HOUR.

I DON'T SEE WHAT THIS IS GOING TO GAIN YOU.

WE DECIDED TO GO AHEAD,
SEEING AS YOU WERE THE ONLY GUEST IN THE HOTEL.

ALAN, I WANT YOU BACK ON THE TELLY.

LISTEN. I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT BEFORE.
YOU CAUGHT ME AT A BAD MOMENT.

SEE YOU LATER.