REMEMBER THE DOUBLE - BANG, BANG.

LYNN, I WAS THINKING
ABOUT GETTING A SUBSTITUTE WIFE.

- HELLO, ALAN.
- HELLO, SUSAN. THIRD FLOOR?

OOH, WAI-YAI.
THAT SOUNDS GEORDIE, DOESN'T IT? WAI-YAI.

NO. HE LIKES TO LIE THERE, THOUGH,
WITH THE "SUNDAY EXPRESS"

- WHO STAYS IN A PLACE LIKE THIS?
- TERRIBLE. IT'S SO STERILE HERE.

- I'D LOVE TO.
- GUESS WHERE HE LIVES.

NICE AND OUT OF THE WAY.

YES, OF COURSE, BUT YOUR MUM AND L,
BELIEVE ME

CAN I OFFER YOU MY DEEP, DEEP...

I COME BACK THIS MORNING ON A COACH.
IT WAS LIKE AN SAS OPERATION.

A FEW WEEKS AGO, I WAS DOING
A CORPORATE FOR ALLIED DUNBAR,

IT'S WHEN PEOPLE RELIEVE THEMSELVES
ON EACH OTHER.

CHEERS!

IT'S A SERIOUS SUBJECT.
I ONCE FOUND A LUMP UNDER MY ARM. AWFUL.

THIS WAS PROBABLY CAUGHT ON CCTV CAMERA.
I'LL THROW THE FOOTAGE IN GRATIS.

AND I LOVE YOUR VIDEOS OF WOMEN IN BIKINIS
BEING HOSED DOWN IN CAR PARKS.

- OH, THERE YOU ARE.
- HOW ARE YOU, MR PARTRIDGE?