SHE'S NOT MY WIFE! I HATE IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS.

WHO WILL HOPEFULLY
NOT BE MASSACRING ANYONE THIS EVENING,

TELL ME YOUR NAME.

NO, SERIOUSLY. IT WAS TEXTBOOK.

- NO,
- WHAT?

HIYA. I'VE COME TO SHOW YOU
HOW TO USE YOUR TELLY.

- YOU CAN'T.
- YOU'VE DONE IT AGAIN!

I JUST HATE THE GENERAL PUBLIC.

IT WOULDN'T BE AN EGG CUP.
IT'D BE TWO EGG CUPS AND A KIDNEY DISH.

GUIDE DOGS FOR THE BLIND. IT'S CRUEL, REALLY, ISN'T IT?

WE DID!

WE MANAGED TO RECTIFY IT, BECAUSE
IT NOW SAYS "COOK" WHERE IT ONCE SAID "COCK",

- HE LIKES AMERICAN STUFF.
- OH.

(FANFARE)

THEN IT CUTS TO JAMES - ROGER MOORE -
AND, YES, HE'S WITH A LADY.

AFTER SIX HOURS OF SURGERY,
THE HAND WAS SEWN BACK ON.

- WHAT HAVE YOU GOT FOR ME?
- DO YOU WANT THE GOOD NEWS OR THE BAD NEWS?

OR DAVE BLOGGS QUEUEING FOR A TICKET
BEHIND A MAN BUYING A TRAVEL PASS.