HE WAS SMELLY MAN. TOMEK DID NOT LIKE HIM.
TOMEK SAID WE DIDN'T HAVE ANY COFFEE.

- I PREFER TO GO ALONE...
- SURE.

- DID YOU BUY IT DOWN THE MARKET?
- AYE.

"JOIN ME TONIGHT WHEN MY GUESTS WILL BE"...
L DON'T KNOW, "CHRIS REA."

NOT MY FACE! I'M DOING A PHOTO-SHOOT
FOR VISION EXPRESS!

- THAT'S WHY YOU WATCHED IT FOR FIFTEEN MINUTES?
- YES, BECAUSE IT WAS THE WRONG FILM.

- SO THIS IS APACHE COMMUNICATIONS?
- YEAH.

DID YOU FIND OUT HOW MUCH SHE'S GOT?

YEAH. I OFTEN THINK I SHOULD
SWALLOW THIS WHOLE

A GOOD SLOGAN FOR THE TOURIST BOARD.

YOU MUST BE MY GUEST. WE DISCUSS ISSUES.

(MUSIC - "OLD MACDONALD HAD A FARM")

- (KNOCKING)
- (LYNN) ALAN! IT'S ME.

- HELLO, MICHAEL. DO YOU WANT TO BE ALONE?
- OH, NO. IT'S NICE TO HAVE COMPANY.

- IT KILL YOU?
- IT'S CHOLESTEROL. SCOTTISH PEOPLE EAT IT.

HELLO. I'M A COMMUNIST WITH A GUN.
I HATE YOU LOT. CAN I USE YOUR TOILET?

IS THAT A GRANITE WORK SURFACE
THAT'S SUPPORTING YOU BOTH?

WELL, WHERE DO I START?