ACTUALLY, I'VE GOT SOME GOOD NEWS. I'VE JUST
COME INTO A SUBSTANTIAL AMOUNT OF MONEY.

- ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE AN OFFER?
- OH, YES, OF COURSE.

YOU MUST KNOW SOME OF THE RUBBISH YOU PRODUCE.
TONGUE, FOR EXAMPLE. WHO EATS TONGUE?

YOU MEAN THEM TRANSEXUALS? I'VE SEEN THEM
BUT THEY'RE DISGUSTING. I KEPT AWAY FROM THEM.

SO WHAT'RE WE GOING TO DO TOGETHER, THEN?
NORWICH IS OUR OYSTER.

I'M DRIVING AROUND IN AN OBSCENE PUBLICATION.
I'D LOVE TO GET MY HANDS ON THE BASTARD.

QUESTION FROM THERE.

YOU'VE COME ALL THE WAY OUT HERE
TO TELL ME ABOUT A WALNUT GEAR KNOB?

BANG!

YOU'RE JOINING ME, ALAN PARTRIDGE,

I'M DOWN, BUT I'M NOT A HO.

YOU'LL LOOK STUPID.

AND A CHAP IN HIS EARLY FORTIES,

SO PERHAPS WE COULD GO AND CHAT
ABOUT ALL MY OTHER IDEAS IN MY ROOM.

WELL, THE "BIG IDEA"
IS THAT WE WANT TO PRODUCE A SHOW

THIS'LL HAPPEN TO YOU WHEN YOU HIT 4O.
IT'S CUTTING INTO MY FINGERS.

THAT'S YOU AS WELL.
SHOOT ME NOW WITH A MASSIVE GUN!

SOME AS YOUNG AS THE ONES
HOLDING BALLOONS OVER THERE -