YOU, TONY HAYERS, HAVE DECIDED NOT TO GIVE ME
ANOTHER TELEVISION SERIES. WHY? BE TOUGH.

CHAMPION!

NO. "WAR OF THE WORLDS." GUESS THE TUNE.

THANKS VEY MUCH FOR BEING
"THIS MORNING'S FARMER", ROBERT MOON.

YEAH. I'D BE DELIGHTED.

SEE YA. WOULDN'T WANT TO BE...

MR PARTRIDGE, UM...

- AYE. THERE'S NAY PORN ON IT.
- DID YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?

- WE MIGHT GIVE YOU A SECOND SERIES.
- THAT'S ABOUT RIGHT.

YOU'RE NOT JUST SEXY,
YOU'RE ALSO A VERY GOOD...FAN CLUB MEMBER.

I WANT YOU HERE.
YOU'D BE MY VERY OWN JOHN WEST TINNED WOMAN.

- YOU EVER BEEN TO IRELAND, ALAN?
- NO. I'D LOVE TO GO.

DON'T WORRY.
IT'S JUST A CUSHION THAT SIMULATES RECTAL GAS.

- IT'S RALPH LAUREN.
- CAN I HAVE A SNIFF?

THE LAST VIDEO WAS CALLED
"CRASH, BANG, WALLOP! WHAT A VIDEO",

AND A CRESCENT OF CRISPS, PLEASE.

..THEN WE BRING THE COWS IN,
GET THEM MILKED BY 6 AM, SO..

I THINK THE DESIGNER HAS GONE FOR THAT...