CASH IN HAND? IT'S NOT A PHRASE WE LIKE.

YOUR MISSION.. GO TO CARDIFF, HAVE FULL SEX
WITH A WOMAN, COME BACK ON THE COACH.

(JILL) THAT'S FINE.

YOU CAN'T USE THE TOILET BECAUSE IT'S BLOCKED.

MAKE IT AS SMOOTH AS YOU POSSIBLY CAN.

SHALL WE STOP TALKING IN A MEDIEVAL WAY?
WHAT'S ON YOUR SHOW TODAY?

ABSO-BLOODY-EXACTLY!

LOOK, ALAN. NO CLOWNS, NO GAGS.

- YOUR P.A.'S HERE.
- HELLO, LYNN, SHALL WE GRAB A PEW?

OH, HELLO. I'D LIKE TO SPEAK
TO FERNANDO PARTRIDGE, PLEASE.

BUT IT'S CHIEFLY JOY AT OTHER PEOPLE'S MISFORTUNES.

BUT EVEN THEN IT WAS STOLEN,

YOU'VE COME ALL THIS WAY,
AND I THINK YOU'RE BEING A BIT NEGATIVE.

BUT HE MUST ALSO SACK HER FROM HER JOB AS HIS
RECEPTIONIST. I DIDN'T MENTION THAT EARLIER,

- ALAN PARTRIDGE.
- DAN MOODY.

WHICH I CAN UNDERSTAND.

WHAT'S THE ONE WITH THE VOLCANO THAT OPENS UP
AND THERE'S ALL CHINKIES JUMPING DOWN?

I'M TALKING ABOUT THE MENO...MENOPAU...
OOH, JILL, YOU KNOW YOUR ONIONS!