I'VE SAT ON THE BASTARD. WOULD YOU BELIEVE IT?

THIS IS "NORFOLK NIGHTS" WITH ALAN PARTRIDGE
AND WE'RE DOING "SUPER TALK".

- WHAT TIME IS IT?
- SIX O'CLOCK.

AND HE IS MR NUMERO...ONE.

EASY TO CONFUSE THE TWO. SOMETIMES PEOPLE
CAN END UP TALKING OUT OF THEIR ARSE, ALAN.

SWEET FEET. OOH!

WHERE WE CAN BUY ANYTHING FROM PLIMSOLLS
TO POSTERS OF FAMOUS HOLLYWOOD STARS,

I'VE HIT FAST FORWARD.
LOOKS LIKE A SORT OF HARDCORE BENNY HILL.

- YOUR ROOM?
- MY ROOM. IN MY HOUSE.

- HELLO, ALAN.
- WHICH IS WHY SHE KNOWS ME.

I GOT REALLY DRUNK LAST NIGHT.
I WAS SICK EVERYWHERE.

MOBILE PHONE NOT HURT TOO MUCH. IS ONLY SMALL.

I IMAGINE THAT'S A MONTH'S WAGES
TO SOMEONE LIKE YOU. HELLO?

I WONDER HOW THEY GET THOSE SWORDS
THROUGH CUSTOMS.

YOUR SALES TECHNIQUE IS AWFUL. AND YOU'RE
LOW ON BODYLINE BRUSHABLE JOINT SEALER.

I'D LIKE YOU TO LAY THEM. CHICKEN!

YOU CAN'T USE THE TOILET BECAUSE IT'S BLOCKED.

SHE REMEMBERED, GREAT!